-- Re-evaluate your values. Make sure that whatever you are beating yourself up about is worth striving for. Some goals, like kindness, integrity, and being self-disciplined, enhance the meaning and quality of life, whereas others only feed into your sense of defectiveness, Dr. Leahy says. 'Some people think, 'I can get Botox and then I'll be lovable.' But the way to be lovable is to do lovable things,' he adds.
──重新评价你的价值观。确定你苦苦为难自己要达到的目标是值得争取的。利亚医生说，有些目标，比如善良、正直、律己，能让生活更有意义更有质量（是值得争取的），其他一些目标则只会让你感到自身的缺陷。
他补充道：“有些人想，‘我可以去注射肉毒杆菌，这样我就会更可爱。’可其实想要变得可爱，应当去做那些值得人爱的事情。”
Breaking the habit of self-criticism can pay big dividends in mental and physical health. 'The way you see yourself can be challenged and changed, and it can literally create new neural pathways in your brain,' says Dr. Legato. 'And as your thinking improves, your immune system improves, your digestion is better, you don't compensate by overeating or drinking, and your anxiety levels go down.'
克服自责的习惯可以令你的身心都受益匪浅。雷加托医生说：“对于自我的认知是可以改变的，而这真的可以在你的大脑中创建出新的思考方式。你的想法改善了之后，你的免疫系统也会得到改善，你的消化能力会更好，你不需要通过多吃多喝来弥补营养，你的焦虑感就会降低。”
You may find you have mental and emotional energy left over for many other things -- including helping other people feel better about themselves.
你可能会发现自己在脑力和情感方面都有很多的能量可以用来做很多别的事情──包括帮助其他人培养良好的自我感觉。