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你是否曾经质疑过自己的能力?

Source: 恒星英语学习网  Onion  2009-07-27  我要投稿   论坛   Favorite  

Among the suggestions experts offer for putting your Inner Critic in its place:
以下是专家提出的抑制自责的建议:

-- Monitor your thoughts. Jotting down your self-critical judgments -- I'm a loser, I'm stupid, I'm ugly -- in a journal or a personal-digital assistant is the first step to mastering them: That process alone may decrease the intensity and frequency. Also note the situations in which these feelings occur and see if you can spot patterns.
──审视自己的想法。在日记或掌上电脑中记下那些自责的论断──我是一个失败者,我是个白痴,我很丑──是控制自责的第一步:这一个步骤就可以有效降低自责的强度和频度。同时记下在什么情况下你会有这种想法,看看是否能够发现其中的规律。

-- Evaluate your judgments. Define your terms and examine whether your standards are arbitrary or fair. If you think you're a 'bad person,' are you a bad person all the time? Are there times when you are adequate? Dr. Muller says patients often find that their views are internally inconsistent. 'I'll ask, 'What does a loser look like to you?' The patient is picturing a guy in sweatpants sitting around the house drinking beer. I say, 'Is that what you did yesterday?' And he'll say, 'Well, no.''
──评价你的论断。审视自己的用词,判断你的标准是主观臆断的还是公正合理的。如果你认为自己是个“差劲的人”,那么你一直都很差劲吗?是不是有时候你还是很能干的呢?穆勒医生说,病人常常会发现自己的观点是相互矛盾的。“我就会问,‘你认为失败者是什么样的?’病人描绘出了一个穿着短裤闲坐在屋里喝啤酒的人。我就问:“那昨天你是这个样子的吗?”他说:‘那倒没有的。’”

Also, try to depersonalize what is really beyond your control. 'Some people think, 'My portfolio is down 35% -- what's wrong with me?' As opposed to, 'What's wrong with the market?'' Dr. Leahy says.
还有,不要把那些不在你可控范围内事情的责任往自己身上揽。利亚医生说:“有些人会想,‘我的投资缩水了35%──我这是怎么回事啊?’却不会去想‘市场是怎么回事啊?’”

-- Collect objective data. Challenge negative thoughts with hard facts. Keep a short list of your achievements on a note card and pull it out when your self-criticism threatens to overwhelm you. Or look back at your own CV and review what you've accomplished. 'Focus on the fact that you made it as a scholarship student -- not that nobody asked you to dance for two years,' says Dr. Legato.
──搜集客观的数据。让硬碰硬的事实来挑战你那些消极的想法。在一张卡片纸上列出一个简短的自我成就表,每次自责情绪来袭时,就拿出来看一看。或者看看自己的简历,回顾一下自己所取得的成就。雷加托医生说:“留意诸如自己获得奖学金这样的事实──而不是整整两年没人请你跳过舞之类的事情。”


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